30 Days of Thanks: Support

In a weird upside down world today, the hubby stayed home with the kids while I went to work. The kids are out of school this week and the hubby took the week off thanks to some PTO he's got to burn. As a result, I was the one in her school clothes, laptop packed up and kissing kids goodbye at the door.

Throughout this whole adventure back into heels, the hubby has been nothing but supportive, emotionally when I need a pick up, and physically when I need him to take kid duty so I can get a few hours of work done. Even though they are far away, my family has been supportive, checking in, being curious and listening to me when I feel stressed. My friends have offered play dates if I need them for child care and have been patient when I seem scattered.

Without this support, I'm not quite sure I'd be able to do what I'm doing. I'm enjoying the work, the people are great and there is something incredibly confidence building about putting on "real" clothes and heading out into the world to use your noggin. But, I'd be lying if I said it wasn't hard. Inevitably, there are days with a deadline that my toddler doesn't understand. There are days when I feel pulled in 100 different directions and I'm in control of none of them. There are days when my messy house points out to me that I am not, in fact, "doing it all."

Those are the days when the hubby, my family and my friends are my lifesaver. Reminding me why I'm doing this, telling me that they are proud of me, urging me on. Today was not one of "those" days (thanks to the hubby being home with the young'uns) and yet there was my sister-in-law, in the midst of her own career-changing happy news telling me how great she thinks it is that I'm doing what I'm doing.

And so far all who have called, emailed or simply asked how it's been going, thank you. I hope I can pay the encouragement forward.

30 Days of Thanks: Brothers

Strep's been making the rounds. The hubby fell after me and Peanut started sporting a ping-pong sized lump in his neck Wednesday that normally would have instilled panic in his mother, but with the dreaded strep germ plowing through the family, it simply meant a trip for a quick throat swab followed by the expected stop at the drug store for ye old antibiotics.

So forgive my absence but I've been alternating between resting, nursing sickos, doctor's offices, work and disinfecting the house.

Between the sick days and a few teacher conference days at Peanut's school, there has been a lot of together time around here. As stressful as all that indoor forced time has been, I have enjoyed watching the budding buddy-ship develop between my two boys. Not that there isn't still a lot of pushing, whacking and toy-stealing, but there has also been whispering, giggling and creating games together. Teamwork has started to emerge and I can see them try to please each other with silly antics or new ideas for train tracks/buildings/car races, beaming with satisfaction when the other one "gets" it.

The kicker was driving the boys home from something the other day and hearing Peanut start singing the ABC song for his little brother and Pumpkin joining in (there are lots of 'E's and 'S's in his alphabet). The sound of their sweet voices together in the car was enough to melt a mother's heart, but peeking in the rearview, I could see their little heads turned towards each other as they sang, smiles on their faces as they got to the "big finish."

I took a mental picture, memorizing the moment in my mother's soul. It's a moment I'll need to hold fast to and remind them of when their relationship is tested, when voices are raised, when life might take them to different corners of the world.

The moment I saw them as more than brothers, but as friends.

30 Days of Thanks: Timing

There is no good time to be sick. Especially when you're a parent.

This time, though, I am thankful that if I had to get strep, at least I got it on a weekend. The hubby took care of the kids all weekend letting me get the rest I needed. He took care of dinners and waking up with the kids and keeping them away when I needed him to. I got to sleep in and take naps and stay in my jammies.

Sure, I'll need to take care of the grocery shopping y, and the laundry at some point this week. But being able to just be for two days and let my body heal instead of squeezing in rest time between car pool and play time on a weekday has been priceless.

I'm not 100 percent yet, but I'm definitely a lot farther along than I would be otherwise. And for that small luxury, I am thankful.

30 Days of Thanks: Silver Linings

I have strep throat. And it sucks. You have no idea how much energy your kids have or how loud they are until you don't feel good and just want to lay still on a couch willing the antibiotics to work faster, much, much faster.

The last time I had strep I was a senior in college. One of my roommates and I drove ourselves to student health, both miserable, and left with two sets of antibiotics. Our third roommate headed for the hills (aka, her boyfriend's apartment) to avoid the germs. Lara and I took up positions on the couches under layers of blankets. There was lots of oatmeal, tea and Lifetime movies. We complained and laughed and in a few days finally felt well enough to disinfect the apartment so our third could come back home.

What was on the surface a no fun couple of days, now is one of my fondest memories of Lara. It was a few days where it was just the two of us. We talked about anything and everything. We commiserated over the pain of swallowing. We had nowhere to go and nothing to do.

Lara passed away seven years ago in a car accident.

So although I am once again prone on the sofa, about to see what crappy TV I can find as I snuggle under a different pile of blankets, I am thinking of Lara and all the silly, wonderful things I miss about her. The butter and sugar she loaded into her oatmeal. The episodes of "Walker, Texas Ranger" she could watch over and over. Her brilliant smile.

It sucks being sick. It sucks that my friend is gone. But thinking about her right now actually makes me feel a little bit better.

Today, Lara, I am thankful for you. I miss you.

30 Days of Thanks: This

It was just one of those days...

The two-bite brownies helped, too.

30 Days of Thanks: Moments of Quiet

The days I head into the office with not much on my agenda but some time to get work done in the presence of other adults always end up being the craziest days. So, it was much to my dismay that a friend texted about meeting at a playground in the afternoon. I just didn't think I could swing it with all that had suddenly appeared in my lap. Then, she offered to simply take the 5 year old for the afternoon so I could get some work done. An unexpected surprise.

What was a miracle was that the littlest guy actually took a nap. Since moving him into his "big boy bed" due to his crawling out of the crib antics, he has not been napping. He was beyond cranky as I tried to pull his lunch together after school today. I took him into our room and rocked him to calm him down. Much to my surprise, he drifted off to sleep.

After settling him into bed, I had an afternoon of quiet in front of me. Not only was I able to get work done, but I was able to do it without the stress of pulled focus.

The icing on the cake was Pumpkin waking up hours later in a fabulous mood. And my mood wasn't so bad either. It's amazing what a nap can do -- for both baby and mama.

30 Days of Thanks: Moments of Beauty

In the every day hustle and bustle of herding children out the door, into the car, back into the car, back into the door and all that fills in the minutes, hours and days in between, I sometimes lose sight of what's right in front of me. The little things. The beautiful things.

A child might hand me a leaf or want to linger by a duck pond providing a moment or two of quiet reflection at the beauty in the world, but it's typically followed by a tantrum about leaving. Luckily, today, I had a longer moment. A moment that was mine.

I was doing crunches (ugh). Along with several other women taking part in today's workout class, I was flat on my back, lifting my shoulders to the sky, lamenting the fact that my abdominal wall might never actually meet in the middle again (or if it did, I will never see it due to that layer I prefer to call insulation). Then, I took a deep breath and saw what was around me. Well, more accurately, what was above me.

A beautiful blue sky. A wisp of a cloud. The warmth of the sun on my arms. The brilliant colors of the leaves. It was breathtaking and quiet and peaceful and I am thankful for being able to recognize that moment. Sometimes that's all you need.